Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome & Christmastime Depression
Being sick can be depressing, especially if you're watching the world around you celebrate while you're isolated - either physically or emotionally - because of your illness. A lot of us who have fibromyalgia (FMS) and chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS or ME/CFS) battle depression anyway, especially during the winter months.
If you're feeling alone or depressed, reach out to someone. About.com's Fibromyalgia & Chronic Fatigue Syndrome community forum is here 24/7, and while there's not always someone there right when you post, it's a safe, understanding place where you can write down how you're feeling without fear of being judged. Everyone there will "get" you. If you're not comfortable posting in a public forum, send me an email, at chronicfatigue.guide@about.com. Sometimes, just writing down your problems can help you get a handle on them. I can't promise to get back to you right away, but I'll do whatever I can to help.
If your feelings really start to overwhelm you and you're thinking about suicide, call this number:
- 1-800-273-8255
It's a VA hotline, but anyone is welcome to call. The staffing and training there are better than at many local agencies, so you'll talk to someone who can really help you.
Millions of people have FMS or ME/CFS, and millions of people suffer from depression. What that means is that we are never alone, and we never have to bear the full burden of our illness alone. Finding out that someone out there understands and cares about you can make all the difference.
If you know someone who might be feeling alone or depressed right now, reach out to them in some way. If you think someone you know is suicidal, help them get help before it's too late.
Please, let's all take care of each other.
Where to Find Help:
- How to Help Someone Who's Feeling Suicidal
- Who to Contact if You're Feeling Suicidal
- International Help Lines (for those outside the U.S.)
- Coping Emotionally with Fibromyalgia & Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
- Find a Support Group
Photo © Juan Silva/Getty Images
Comments
While reading this my phone rang. My son and daughter-in-law wanted to know if they could come over Christmas day at 8:00 AM to open gifts. No…i’m disab. and getting up at all is a chore for me. I suggested Christmas Eve, but she doesn’t want to open gifts then. It would really help if family members were more understanding to those of us who are chronically ill. I find it depressing to be asked to do things that are extremely difficult for me **sighing**
I know how you feel. Before becoming a grandparent I had all sorts of images in my head of how wonderful I was going to be.It is distressing when you can’t live up to your own expectations. A psychologist advised me I had to learn to say ‘no’ if I couldn’t cope with something. We recently said we would only have out 1 and 3 year old grandchildren overnight provided they weren’t sick. (We had previously had a bad night and not only were exhausted but caught the virus and had a week of sickness between us.)While I am the one with FMS at age 56 (had it for 16 years) and my husband is a healthy 59 yr old, we can’t deal with sleepless nights any more, even though I did when my 4 children were young. Since this refusal (which I retracted at the last minute and said I would have them sick or not), I have noticed a distinct ‘coolness’ on the part of my daughter in law. I think she thinks I am a wimp as I always put on a good ‘face’(with the help of medications) and am lucky enough to still have good times drinking and dancing at weddings etc.I often suffer afterwards but I think it is worth it as you are a long time dead. I also suffered from endometrial cancer last year and just 5 weeks after the total hysterectomy we were back minding kids on a long weekend so they could compete in sporting activites and socialise with friends. I don’t think people are aware of either the physical and mental effects of FMS, even when you tell them often enough how much you are aching etc.I end up feeling like a real loser.
Too be honest the losers are those who miss out on being compassionate. Sounds to me their desires to go to sports week-ends are drowning out the need to be understanding. By doing so they are missing out on being loving and considerate. Thus lessening the potential of your relationship. I had to learn to put myself first to feel good about myself. This time of year it’s easy to do just to please … not saying being selfish but being honest even if the others aren’t mature enough to handle it graciously. Remember ask yourself if you tell someone something and they can’t handle it Who has the the problem? The answer is they do. And they’ll have to learn to deal with it. For heaven’s sake you had Cancer Too!! Hope I’m not too blunt but try to see it from God’s view … who would he be correcting??